Spending time on weddings and constantly working to be a better husband keeps me thinking about what makes our marriage work. One of the best pieces of advice we were given that has been carried from engagement to present day is a simple and profound practice. Each time there is a splash of tension or the outbreak of a fight, we simply hold hands. I can promise you that no matter how irritating it might be to try to reach out and hang on, it diffuses so much tension and makes you slow down and think before speaking. No matter how obvious this seems—try it. It will surprise you how challenging it is yet the simplicity will transform your choice of words and level of patience. Touching someone affectionately alters your internal frustration.